🎧 Current Podcast; 10 Lesson I Have Learned from the Last 300 Episodes of On Purpose — Jay Shetty
In this episode, Shetty shares insight on the 10 most profound lessons he has learnt from his last 300 collaborative interview episodes and solo episodes. It was an exhilarating listen, each and every lesson I have tried to implement in my life, or take some action from them. Lesson #1, Be Patient For The Big Things and Impatient About The Small Things, resonated quite deeply.
What does being patient for the big things and impatient for the small things truly mean? It means that when it comes to our day to day life, we must take action now and build momentum, and when it comes to our big aspirations, we must give them time to come to fruition.
In life, many of us have aspirations and dreams. We spend time visioning the future, hoping that it turns out the way we want. The issue us, we go about achieving these goals the wrong way. Many of us simply think about them, without taking true action. We want these goals so desperately, we expect them as soon as possible. And sometimes, we expect them to come without any hard or meaningful work. We go about it with an impatient attiude.
We must learn to be patient for these huge goals, they are not to come overnight. Good things take time, Rome wasn’t built in a day! It helps to be realistic, look at the bigger picture, and cultivate an aura of tranquility, knowing that these things will come, if we are patient.
However, how can we be 99% sure that they will come? We will achieve our grand goals if we are impatient about the small things.
In our day to day life, there are a million and one different things that you could do today that would bring you closer to your goals. You must have a desire for these things, a desire to become 1% better each day. We need to be impatient with the habitual actions, we need to strive for more in our day to day. This means asking questions and reflecting. It means improving the little things, such as the connections with business partners for example, or our current physical health. If we spend too much time looking to the future and not acting on the now, none of our goals will become reality. Long term results are yielded if we are impatient about the things in our control.
When we have a drive to give it our all each day, the long term goals will begin to present themselves. However, if we spend too much time desiring the big things and not harnessing patience, it is unlikely that they will come at all.
📖 Current Read; 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living — Ryan Holiday
I finally picked this book up after a long time of deliberation; it felt fitting for the new year. Each day of the year, Holiday and his co author Stephen Hanselman write a short passage, featuring a quote from a great Stoic, and a few actionable points. On January 3rd, the passage focused on being ruthless to the things that don’t matter.
Lots of us have a fear of saying no. The factors behind why we say no are infinite, they usually involve us not wanting to upset somebody. So we say yes, to avoid an awkward conversation or hurting somebody, yet this leads to our suffering. We say yes when we don’t want to, and we regret it. We regret it the second after the word leaves out mouth. This harms you, your mind and your soul. Why?
When we say yes to the things that don’t matter, we take away precious time to work on what does matter. If we are too busy going to social gatherings, family meet ups and events, we lose the one finite resource that is ours, time. We lose time for ourselves, for the activities that matter to us. This does not regard only physical but emotional drainers too. If we allow greed, stealth, hate and envy into our life, we lose time for joy, tranquility and stillness.
This is why it is essential to be ruthless to the things that don’t matter. We cannot keep suffering just to please others. We cannot lose any more of our time. We cannot give in to these emotions.
We must begin to honour ourselves by saying no to what is not an absolute priority or essential. We must risk hurting a friend, or missing out on an event, because that time can be dedicated to our growth. That time can be dedicated to writing articles, reading books, completing outlines. We should also use the time to rest, to unwind and reflect. To be still. For when we take this time for ourselves, we are much more in alignment, much more peaceful.
The more you say yes, the more time and peace you lose. The more you are ruthless, the more you can grow, learn and evolve.
As Seneca said, “How many have laid waste to your life when you weren’t aware of what you were losing, how much was wasted in pointless grief, foolish joy, greedy desire, and social amusements–how little of your own was left to you. You will realize you are dying before your time!”
Idea of the Week 💭
Live In The Present
Those 4 words seem incredible simple, and they are, but they are not easy to live by.
What does it mean to live in the present? This practice means to let go of all worries, doubts and fears, and live each small moment in the now, doing everything you can to make that moment your best.
Leonardo Da Vinci, the great painter, has spoken on this topic. He sees an image of a man ‘who with perpetual longing always looks forward with joy to each new spring and each new summer … deeming the things he longs for are too slow in coming; and who does not perceive that he is longing for his own destruction’
We are inclined to want something that we don’t have, each and every one of us. We want another car, or the newest iPhone, maybe not even materialistic but emotional satisfaction. We spend so much time longing for things that are not ours that we rid ourselves of the only thing that is ours, the present moment.
When we long for each new summer, as Da Vinci writes, we are inadvertently longing for our own destruction. We are wishing away the time we have for something that is not guaranteed to be ours. We only have the now, we do not have that next item, that next summer.
And so, we should aim to live in the present. Or, in other words, aim to find happiness in ourselves, not anywhere else. When we wish for the next summer and the next spring, we are consciously or unconsciously hoping that it will bring us happiness. We believe that getting another item will bring us the long term satisfaction that we crave. But, when that item is actually ours, the joy fades after a while, and we look again to the next item.
This is faulted, as we are looking for happiness in outside sources. Other items, people, emotions and places will never bring us the permenent joy that we desire. That is only found in ourselves. So it is futile to wish for the next summer and spend the present moment distracted. For we are losing grasp of what actually matters, the present moment, and the great joy within. When you find this joy in yourself, you ache to live in the present as much as possible. You do not find yourself wanting to escape and longing for something ‘different’.
If we can become masters at living in the present, and becoming content with it, we will be much happier in the long run. It is key to recognise that materialistic items, the things we dont have, will not bring happiness, rather, look in to yourself for that fulfilment.
To end, here’s a question from me! ⚡️
Will your future self be happy with the way you are currently spending your time?
Thanks for reading!
Sam. 😆
